Montessori Monday: Grace & Courtesy



I like to think that Kale is like any other two year old could use some work on his grace and courtesy skills. We've recently entered the "mine" phase and any sense of sharing and manners seem to have disappeared from Kale's little mind. Kale is good at sharing - but only when he wants to. He's good at waiting his turn - but only as long as his patience lasts. He says please and thank you when he remembers - but not when you remind him. You get the picture. 

Yet as much as I'd like to think all his behaviours are typical of a two year old, I think he is a bit unique when it comes to his barbaric table manners. He long ago refused to sit in a booster chair, favouring his small table and chairs set that resembles his school setting. Then he changed his mind and decided that sitting at the big table with mama and papa was kind of awesome. Especially when you can dance and bounce on your chair, reach for food off other people's plates, and demand that everyone finish as soon as do. 

I know that grace and courtesy - walking carefully, carrying things, moving gracefully, offering food, saying "please" and "thank you" and so are - is an important category of practical life activities for Montessori. When I talked to Kale's teachers, I found out that he's the picture of good grace & courtesy at snack and lunchtime with his classmates. Clearly we needed to work on it at home! 

MariaMontessori.com has a great post about the Magic of Grace & Courtesy and LivingMontessoriNow.com has a great collection of grace and courtesy activities for at home or school if you're interested in learning more. 

In an effort to work on Kale's grace and courtesy, we decided a tea party was in order: 


During our tea party, we worked on taking turns pouring our tea, sharing our treats, inviting others (papa) to join us, waiting until everyone was finished, sitting in our chair, and saying please and thank you. Kale did surprisingly good with this activity! I think that engaging him more with simple tasks (like passing a cup) and being more deliberate with my own manners was what made the difference. Sometimes dinner can just be a rush to get to the table and then Kris and I spend the meal trying to catch up on our day with one another, rather than demonstrating grace & courtesy to Kale. I'm excited to try some of the things we did at our tea party at the dinner table tonight! 


How do your kids do at the dinner table? How are their manners? What do you do to help them improve their grace and courtesy? 

I'm linking up with Living Montessori Now for Montessori Monday and Covered in Grace Monday Meet Up

14 comments:

  1. I love role playing to teach things like this! Play is a child's learning ground.
    New follower thanks to GFC Hop

    Candice
    www.lillythroughthevalley.blogspot.ca

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  2. I feel like this post is a snapshot of our lives! Our twin two year olds sound exactly like Kale in their behaviours and table antics. It seems magnified by 10 with two of them yelling "mine" at the same time. We have spent all week working on please and thank you (which they used to do no problem). Loved this post. Thank you so much!

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  3. Buckaroo is never the same two meals in a row. A lot depends on his level of "restedness", I have noticed. Many times he is rough-and-tumble at the table when he is off his regular routine or we have company (of course). Still, I am consistently proud of him in his progress in this area... better every day! I think a tea party is an awesome idea for practice. =)

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  4. Can't love your blog more. Found you on the blog hop and I'm so happy! A new follower!!!

    XOXO -
    Jenny
    www.hippieinheels.net

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  5. Oh I live grace and courtesy and tea parties! We do something similar here, I love your bright colored tea set, and the photos! Have a great week :)

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  7. This is awesome! I never had tea parties as a kid - so I am obviously jealous of Kale - and you! Dude invite us for a tea party. I promise to practice grace and courtesy - or at least Kale could show me a thing or two.

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  8. Hey girl! I'm stopping by from the blog hop. I'm one of the co-hosts! Thanks for linking up!

    I hope you're having an awesome day! :)

    -Alexis
    www.livingthewifestyle.com

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  9. what a wonderful idea!!! that's definitely something worth putting in my "future skills" manual. thanks for sharing :)

    Have a lovely evening <3 Amy @ Interpret As You May

    {I have a celebratory giveaway going on now. Would love for you to enter! amyreneonline.com}

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  10. I love tea parties to teach grace and courtesy ... and your tea party photos are awesome (as usual)! Thanks for linking to my post! And thanks for linking up with Montessori Monday. I featured your post at the Living Montessori Now Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/LivingMontessoriNow

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  11. Awesome post. I never thought to do a tea party to teach manners. My son does well sometimes, but other times he throws his entire plate of food everywhere. It all depends on the day.
    I am just stopping by from the Mommy brain mixer to follow you and say hi!

    www.adventureswithcaptaindestructo.com

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  12. Sounds wonderful! You're right that most of the time, we are so rushed, that we forget to slow down and demonstrate the same courtesy that we so desire from our kids!

    Visiting you from the Mommy Brain Mixer. I am now a follower. Do visit my blog when you get a chance!

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  13. Lovely blog! I really love your photos. My children love sitting with tea sets, I think it's the tiny-ness of it all. Your little one is adorable! I really like the photo of him pouring the tea. I'm constantly working on table manners, while trying to not helicopter. I do think that they naturally become better as they grow older. Now following you via the hop, please check my blog out if you have the chance! All the best, Monica

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  14. I'm in need of all the learning a girl can get on teaching manners. My baby is still a little young for the tea party (though I love this idea!) but I wanna be prepared when that chapter of life unfolds. Thanks for sharing and for the links too!

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