20 weeks!!! I can't believe I'm at the half way point and that in a few short months, we will become a family of four. I think every 'second time parent' is worried about having enough love to give another child and feeling guilty about the fact that their first will no longer be the sole focus of your universe. For whatever reason, all of those emotions exploded this week, turning me into a hot mess of panic and fear and guilt and hormones. Even more so, I'm feeling awful about how much I'm working these days when really I should be taking every extra second to love on my family of three and appreciate this time. So let's hold (virtual) hands and repeat "we can do anything, but we can't do everything." x 1 million. And breeeeaathe.
For those of you that lost sleep last night wondering the results of our ultrasound - you will be sleepless for many more nights. All I can report is that this baby appears to have two arms, two legs, a head, a heart and a spine. Also, it is NEVER necessary to drink as much water as they tell you. I had to stop the tech and pee twice - TWICE - during the 45 minute ultrasound. She was clearly unimpressed with my inability to hold my bladder and I believe it's a fair observation to say that she's been doing this job for about 10 years too long. The short of it is - I had the crankiest ultrasound tech ever and she took out her bitterness on me and my bladder and my baby's inability to stay still by refusing to reveal the sex of our baby (technically she didn't "refuse" so much as told us she couldn't get a clear look).
In terms of how I'm feeling, I'm happy to report that I have not had morning sickness in two entire weeks. Instead I have debilitating back pain. I had a lot of issues with pinched nerves and sciatica near the end of my pregnancy with Kale, but never this bad and definitely not this early. Making an appointment with a chiropractor is at the top of my list right now.
Kale is still very, very stoked about the baby and is actually much more forward thinking than Kris or I. On the weekend he shared idea's on where he thinks the baby should sleep (in his bed with him or in a crib at the end of his bed) and had a meltdown to end all meltdowns when he realized we didn't have diapers. I'm glad something is thinking about this stuff, because it certainly isn't Kris or I (otherwise known as 'parents of the year').
Happy hump/bump day :)